The First Time Someone Shows You Who They Are…You Should believe Them

My daughter and I were talking recently about a guy she was dating. While he started out strong with things she appreciated like daily texts, of “Good morning beautiful” and good night texts of “Sweet dreams”, his attentiveness and terms of endearment fizzled out pretty quickly.

She was frustrated and doubting if he was into her so I suggested she hint that she liked that sort of thing.

My very wise daughter said, “Nah, I am not going to ask him to do anything nor am I going to tell him what I like. Instead, I am going to watch and observe and see if who he truly is, is the kind of guy I want to date.”

I was blown away by her ability to see things so clearly and realistically. She was right-she shouldn’t have to ask a guy to do the little things that she loves, because then it will always be a chore instead of something that comes naturally to him.

If your ideal guy is say for example, Noah (Ryan Gosling), from The Notebook, then don’t settle for the arrogant fiancé. Believe that you deserve a guy who will fight for you to the end.

Life is too short for mediocre love.

My daughter is beautiful and sweet and of course, with no bias whatsoever on my part, she deserves to have the kind of guy who is thrilled to do little things that mean so much.

Don’t we all deserve that?

There is no sense teaching someone how to behave when there are so many people whose values align with yours.

At the end of the day, even someone who seems too good to be true will show their true colors if you take off the blinders long enough to see.

So in the beginning of a relationship, if someone is disrespectful or a liar or a cheater, trust that that is who they really are.

Remember the old adage, “People don’t change.”

Liars continue living lies, it’s all they know.

Take my daughter’s advice-watch, observe, say little and then decide if who they are is who you want to be with.

Maya Angelou, the famous poet, said it best. I’ve had to re-read her quote dozens of times to remind myself of what should be so obvious.

After having the conversation with my daughter, I am more sure than ever that, “The first time someone shows you who they are, you should believe them.”